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Note to family integrated churches
BibleNavigators.com
does not show preference to traditional youth
programs or family integrated churches. We feel that
there is no biblical preference given to one model
over the other. Our primary concern is training a
child in the way they should go. Under what church
context that occurs does not really matter. We love
both family integrated churches as well as effective
youth programs.
Why doesn't BibleNavigators.com oppose
traditional youth ministry?
Deuteronomy 31:12-13 is a common proof text given
for why youth ministry is “unbiblical.” The
principle behind this argument appears to be that
because all the men, women and children were
gathered into one place that it (a) must be
the only allowed way to teach children and (b)
other methods of teaching children are in violation
of this commandment. The problem with this
interpretation is that there is no logical
contradiction between God commanding, “Gather the
people around to learn my law” and “Gather children
together to be taught by a teacher.” In fact, when
the tribes of Israel were gathered together, they
had to break into smaller groups taught by the
elders. How these divisions occurred is not
commanded. The only element of import to this
command is that they (a) be gathered and
(b) be taught the law and that (c)
children receive special attention so they will come
to know God’s laws. It could easily be argued
(though not dogmatically) that verse 13 is a basis
for children’s ministry because although men, women,
children and aliens are commanded to hear God’s laws
in verse 12, only the commandment concerning
children being taught God’s law is repeated.
It’s God’s way of saying, “Pay special attention
just to the children who need to learn my laws as
well.”
A
common belief held by some family integrated
churches is that children should not be taught by
persons other than their parents or only by others
in the presence of parents. If this is true, then
Paul would be in violation for teaching John Mark or
Timothy away from their parents. John Mark and
Timothy were most likely children during their
journeys with Paul. This view would also be
problematic for children of non-Christian parents.
The church would have no basis for evangelizing
unsaved children. Though it is common to make an
exception and say that children from unsaved
families are allowed to be evangelized, the question
must be asked, “If the church can single out
children from unsaved families, why not the children
from saved families?” Nowhere in the bible is there
a commandment saying, “Children cannot be taught by
adults other than their parents unless the parent is
present.” To say that Deuteronomy prohibits Sunday
school and youth programs is to read between the
lines. It also makes Paul out to be a sinner for
mentoring John Mark and Timothy on his journeys.
It’s a case that can’t hold water.
Why
can’t children receive specialized attention and
lessons just for them? Why can’t those lessons be
taught by spiritual leaders other than the child’s
own parents? A common objection is that parents need
to be the primary spiritual authority teaching their
children. But one has to wonder how taking a child
for only one hour each week threatens the
role of an involved parent for the remaining 167
hours in the week! Sunday schools and youth programs
offer little threat to the influence parents have
over their children. If parents and churches are
concerned about other people influencing their
children’s spiritual upbringing then greater
influences such as the 30 to 40 hours each week
children spend in secular public schools
needs to be pointed out.
If
it’s important to simplify lessons in math, writing
or science for children shouldn’t it be infinitely
more important to simplify lessons just for
children? An integrated church’s response to this
question may be, “That’s why parents should teach
their children at home, but children still need to
go to an integrated church service on Sundays.” But
where is it a contradiction in the Bible to plan
biblical lessons just for children while they are at
church? Prohibitions to Sunday school programs are
not found in Scripture. It also seems odd that a
parent would worry about a church that creates
programs focusing just on children. Such special
attention to children is a sign of a healthy church
not a bad one. This doesn’t mean that there
aren’t bad Sunday school programs and bad Sunday
school teachers. The solution, however, should not
always be to eradicate Sunday school programs. If
better equipping Sunday schools is an option, then a
church should let the program remain. If the church
is not prepared to teach children in youth programs
or cannot control its programs, then family
integration is a great solution.
The
problems facing our youth have nothing to do with
whether your church does or does not have a Sunday
school program. The issue is whether children are
being singled out to be taught the Gospel message
and whether parents remain the primary spiritual
guardians of their children. What most family
integrated churches have right is that parents need
to be the primary spiritual teachers in their
child’s life. What many integrated churches and
mainstream churches have wrong is the belief that
any other church structure is unbiblical or that one
is more biblical than another.
I’ve received the objections that “the Bible teaches
that parents should be the primary teachers of their
children.” The logic of this argument seems to be
that sending your children off to Sunday school
replaces the parent’s primary role in the child’s
life. Again it must be asked, how does only one
hour each week threaten the role of an involved
parent who has the child for the remaining 167 hours
in the week? Secondly, having the child in the main
service still doesn’t solve the objector’s problem
because the child is still learning from the pastor
and not the parent during the service. In either
scenario, the child is being taught by someone other
than the parent. Family integrated churches do not
solve the “problems” they claim to fix. The fact is
that neither family integrated churches nor youth
programs are better than the other so long as
children receive attention in being taught biblical
truths at the level they understand.
Family integration and youth programs become a
problem when churches develop an elitist attitude
concerning how children ought to be taught. Children
in family integrated churches are sometimes (rarely)
indoctrinated by anti-Sunday school beliefs to such
an extant that they are incapable of healthy
interaction around new adults and children in large
group settings. Youth programs are often a detriment
because so many rely of hype instead of spiritual
substance. Children in many youth programs are often
incapable of sitting still long enough to learn
anything of spiritual import. By the same token,
family integrated churches can teach children to
tune out teaching adults because they grow so
accustom to hearing sermon content vastly over their
heads. Again, the solution isn’t to get rid of youth
programs or get rid of family integration. The
solution is to devote church time and resources to
teaching kids about God. Many integrated churches
have a superb culture for training children, but so
do many churches with youth programs. Either church
model can be really good or really
bad. To say that either youth programs or family
integration is “the solution” to problems facing
children in the church misses the point. The
solution is that,
starting with the parents,
we devote ourselves to our family learning God’s
word regardless of church structure.
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